Let's Catch Up

A lot has happened in my world in these oppressive days of August besides people blowing off people on their milestone birthday.  But that's a long story for another time...or for never.

I guess the biggest thing that happened is that I closed my little shop after a grand total of 2.5 months.

The main reason for making the decision to close the shop was because the warehouse building it was in is not air-conditioned.  Unfortunately we were not specifically made aware of this when we signed the lease back in much cooler May.  The management never actually said a word about it and later, when we realized the situation and checked the wording of the lease, all it said was that they provided "ventilation".  Who knew that in 2016 that meant no AC? ("Ventilation" meant floor fans which are almost totally ineffective with booths/partitions.)



It didn't even cross our minds that they wouldn't have AC or some other temperature dropping means
that would keep the building less than suffocatingly hot. June in that building wasn't so bad; July was pretty awful (which is when we realized there was no AC), and by August it was Africa hot in there. Some of you know that I have lung issues and can't be in extreme heat so I couldn't even spend any time in my own little shop which is, of course, ridiculous.  Plus there was no way in hell and in good conscience that I was going to advertise and encourage people to shop there.  What would I say? Come shop in my little shop and be sure to dress lightly and bring lots of water to keep hydrated? Free salt pills for everyone?!

Maybe I could have handed out instructional flyers to my customers
to instruct them what to do in the event of heat stroke.

Luckily, I was able to get out of the lease (for a fee, of course).

So we learned some lessons, the main one being that even though it's 2016 you still have to ask questions about proper heating/cooling! Also, do lots and lots of research before signing on the dotted line.  Ask the "dumb" questions, i.e. the ones that seem obvious. When dealing with business people, there is a lot to be said for transparency...or, alas, lack thereof.  Don't get me wrong: the people were really nice.  But I did feel that when they didn't verbally divulge important things like the lack of a cooling system and instead expected me to figure that out on my own by reading in-between the lines of the contract (i.e. using the word 'ventilation' instead of explicitly stating 'building does not currently have air-conditioning')...well, that's a big turn off.  It felt very disingenuous to me.

One of the main things to do if you are considering a similar endeavor is to definitely watch for the non-specifics. Dig around, do your research! I can't emphasize that one enough.  I found out too late that the owners had started one of those pages where you ask other people to donate money. Theirs was to try and raise money (22k!) for an air-conditioning system.  Normally those pages are for things like helping people with medical needs, charity, etc (although there was that one guy who started one so he could make potato salad)...not for what - in my opinion -  a legitimate, professional business owner should have in place before ever opening a business.  Seriously, if you have to ask people to fund some major part of your endeavor then in all likelihood it's probably a good idea to wait until you have your sh*t together a little more. Had I found out about that before I signed a lease I would most definitely not have signed.  If it feels like a red flag, it IS a red flag.  Pay attention to that.

Oh well, you live and learn.  So for now I am back to selling my stuff online which, quite honestly, feels most right for me.  No pressure and I'm the one in control.  Yup, that's just how I like it.

I've pretty much had enough of summer.  As one of the lucky 1% of the population with Reverse or Summer S.A.D., this has been a summer with very little rain and - as the weather people like to say - "abundant sunshine" as well as ridiculous dew points that make breathing almost impossible. Basically that all adds up to my idea of hell. I spend summer cocooned in my office with the blackout shades pulled all the way down to block out all sunshine, and the air conditioner set to mildly arctic.
Everyone always says "but you have a swimming pool!"  Yes, but why would I leave a comfortable, dark house to go outside and sweat and not be able to breathe?
Thankfully I've found some forums for us one-percenters where everyone bitches and moans about the sun and heat while posting pictures of fall and winter.  Although I'm not a winter lover except for the breathable air part but it does help an awful lot to know I'm not the only one who hides from summer. There's always these great festivals and events in summer and all I can think of is how hot and uncomfortable they must be with "real feel" temps that soar over 100°F and cranky people and uncomfortable clothes that stick to you because you can't stop sweating.  Not my idea of fun.
Here's an article from a kindred spirit: Good Riddance To Summer; A Thoroughly Un-British Season

Was summer always this awful with air so thick it feels as if you could actually slice it?  I mean, I used to be so active in the summertime and there's no way I would have done the things I used to do if it were crazy humid out.  When I was little my mom used to say that one day we would have Florida weather here in NJ.  I used to think she was on something but now I think she was on to something!

But I think the worst part of it all is the lack of rain and cloudy days.  Oh, how I love rain and clouds. Instead it's just been endless days of glaring, suck-the-life-out-of-me sunshine.  No summer storms to break up the heat, no porch-sitting while listening to the faraway rumble of thunder.
Nerves are on edge.  We need the rain and the benefits of its negative ions.

At least there's always wine to get me through until it finally cools down/gets cloudy/rains.

 -Sharon

TMS

It's Monday, here's what's happening:

It is the end of July and like clockwork for the past 30+ late July's of my life I develop a severe case of TMS.

Too Much Sunshine.

Symptoms include:
unexplained anger; short-temperedness; debilitating fatigue; sudden onset road rage; crying jags; wild, uninhibited shopping sprees for items such as blackout curtains, awnings, beach umbrellas, dark sunglasses, ridiculously wide-brimmed hats, etc.; and plenty of alcohol for self-medication purposes.



I already hate the sun.  That's a year round thing for me.

Combine incessant, oppressive, glaring-through-my-soul sunshine with excessive heat and humidity and that's a perfect recipe for me to Find Comfort In The Fetal Position In The Darkest Corner Of My House. I have been known to becoming almost hysterical and melting down (no pun intended) in times of TMS when it hasn't rained in awhile. I have witnesses.  Ask my long-suffering husband and daughter.  Poor things.

I am a Summer SAD (Reverse Seasonal Affective Disorder) sufferer which is the opposite of the more well-known Winter SAD, for which sufferers get relief from increasing their sun exposure.  I need to decrease my sun exposure...drastically.  Right now what I really need is about a week of steady rain. Cloud cover.  Some Summer SAD people love cold and snow.  That's not me.  As the temperature steadily works its way toward the 100-degree mark as I write this, I am not wishing instead that there was a blizzard outside.  I like mild weather.  I like being outside.  I like not being encumbered by layers of clothing. I just hate the sun.

Check back with me in October.  This should pass by then.

-Sharon

 

Midsummer(ish) Update

Wait, is it really midsummer?
Technically it isn't.  In fact, summer isn't even a month old yet.  But summer to me runs from Memorial Day to Labor Day so mid-July is midsummer.

Anyway...
here we are at mid-July.  I've been in the house a lot, hiding from the sun since I break out if I spend longer than 5 minutes in sunshine.  Not minding being in the house, by the way, since I hate humidity and southern New Jersey has been thinking it's in the tropics lately.


We finally finished working on our swimming pool.  Hallelujah.
When we bought this house six months ago we knew the pool was 'as is'.  JP can basically fix anything and he saw that as a challenge.  I saw it as a money pit and I didn't care one way or another if we had a swimming pool or not.  Alas, he won that battle and went to work making the pool right.
Unfortunately for some really weird and unknown reason we couldn't get one iota of information from the former owners about the poor pool which made things all the more difficult.  Not sure while all the secrecy; we were already under contract before we even started asking questions about it.
People are weird.



We had to paint the pool.  Have you ever painted a pool?  I have and it's the direct opposite of fun.
Of course we painted the pool when it was hellishly hot out and I am not ashamed to admit that I did my share of pool painting in my underwear.  A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.  Thank God for privacy.

Here's what we started with:

You can see the stain marks that all had to be patched and repaired.  Funnnnnky!

And here's where we're at now:

Phew, it's done.  And while I am spending lots of time indoors, I do actually leave the house to swim in it and now there's a movable umbrella (not pictured) so I can sit under it from inside the pool and still be protected from the sun.  Our yard is super shady so the sun is only on the pool for a few hours in the afternoon anyway.  Perfect.

My little shop is doing really, really well!

We are selling a ton of stuff including JP's distressed furniture and my hand painted signs.

I have to say that it is really nice to be taking a break from the photo art for a little bit.  Switching gears is always a good idea when things get stale, right?  It's just a bit of a slowdown right now since I could never ever not create photo art.

Taking pictures in the summertime is weird and I think that's one of the reasons for the need to step away a little.  My stuff tends to have a stark look about it and all the trees and other green stuff of summer sort of conceal that beautiful rawness that I strive for.

This is really weird...I started to notice that a few of the people who were followers of my photo art - and in particular my Facebook page devoted to it - had some kind of expectation of me...or of a version of me that wasn't me at all.  It was like they thought I was some sort of Pollyanna who drove around the countryside in my gingham dress taking pictures of farm life.  I have to admit that I bought into that for awhile and it messed with me bad.  I would have these thoughts that I had to keep up their image of me so that I didn't lose them as followers.  Ridiculous, right?  For the record, I am pretty much the complete opposite of a Pollyanna.
For example:
Sometimes I curse on a regular basis.  I have tattoos and a pierced nose. I love wine, regularly. I dress in black every single day (not goth, just love black).  I'm a born and bred New Jerseyan and everybody knows that you would be hard pressed to find a Pollyanna in NJ.
I'm not two people. I'm one salty person who sees beauty in things that a lot of people overlook.  Yes, I drive around the countryside almost everyday with my cameras taking pictures of as much beauty as I can capture...and sometimes while I'm doing that I say
"%$*# you" to the person behind me who is tailgating me.
I've been a walking contradiction my whole life.
Not gonna hide that anymore.

 

For My Rain-Loving Compatriots

The weather people are extolling with greet glee that today will be a day
with "abundant sunshine".

They say this as if everyone within their listening or viewing range will fall to their knees in gratitude and joy upon hearing such a declaration.

Some of us know they are wrong. Not everyone is elated by abundant sunshine.  Some of us find it rather oppressive.

"Unfortunately", the weather people say, tomorrow will bring showers and possibly storms (completely ignoring the building drought situation in our region).
Sun days = fun days and that's what really matters.

Here are some resources and graphics for those of us who disagree:

"Rainy Day In The City" by Tom Shropshire
This painting basically captures what my perfect day looks like.

"9.Your level of creativity is directly related to the weather. Bright and sunny? Creative drought. Steady downpour of rain? Steady downpour of ideas."
21 Things Only People Who Prefer Rain Over All Other Weather Will Understand

What Is The Personality Type Of People Who Like Rain Very Much?
(Hint: It's not because we're depressed or have gothic tendencies)

City Data: Reverse SAD - Love Of Cloudy Days and Dislike Sunny Days

Harvard Business School: Blue Skies, Distractions Arise: How Weather Affects Productivity

7 Signs You're A Pluviophile

“Let the rain kiss you. Let the rain beat upon your head with silver liquid drops. Let the rain sing you a lullaby.” ― Langston Hughes

"Whenever it rains you will think of her.” ― Neil Gaiman 

I'm A Big Sell Out

So my new little shop has basically sold out. It took 10 days. We definitely didn't expect this.

Oh, there's still some little stuff there but a bunch of the other little stuff has sold and the big pieces of furniture have sold and I haven't been there since Sunday so I imagine it kind of looks like this except for the yellow hutch cabinet which sold and is no longer there:

Crazy.

Crazy great, that is!

"I'm Too Old To Do Fun Things"...WHAT?!

I have been playing around with a whole bunch of new stuff.  We are soon opening a new little shop; I've been building a new website; I want to do more blog/podcast/video -ing.  Then there's the artwork, the sign painting, the other stuff I do that no one knows about.

I do not fit the demographic for some of the stuff that I do.  For instance, the blog/podcast/video (blogpodvid?) thing.  I l♥ve doing it.  I love the technology, the editing, adding the images and music.
It's a blast.
It's also the domain of people who are at least 20+ years younger than me.
All of these younger people are out there having the time of their life with all of this stuff.  Most of them are just documenting their lives and interests by way of video.  I subscribe to some of them (not the stupid ones) and they inspire me on a regular basis.

Which got me to wondering how many older people are doing this.  I searched for women my own age doing this sort of thing because I'd also like to be inspired by my peers...



I was so happy to find some.  So happy.  Better still, they all seem to have their own community where they support each other!  Imagine that: supportive community on the Internet!

We older people have so much to offer the world.  We have opinions based on real world experience not just what the status quo tells us we should regurgitate.  We have character and wisdom.  We can share what we know and we can do it with humor or more seriously.  We've been married and divorced, had careers, education, mortgages, hobbies, travesties, raised children, suffered losses, reveled in victories.  We've been defeated, praised, exhausted, discriminated against, sick, healthy, weird, lost, found, uptight, the opposite of uptight, hated, loved...and on and on it goes.

So why aren't we talking about it all?

Awhile ago a message popped into my head and through the years it keeps getting stronger and stronger and it's now my all-the-time mantra:  TELL YOUR STORY.

Please don't tell me that you don't have a story to tell.  There are people out there who think your story is far more fascinating than some stupid celebrity-type.  I love hearing about people's lives, the minutiae.  I would love for you to go for a walk around your town and take pictures of what you see (I am the type who would enjoy coming over to watch your home movies).  The view changes constantly and no one ever sees the same things no matter how much you walk the same path.

I've got this thing going on now and after some initial trepidation that I've gotten over I also have come to realize that it doesn't matter one single iota if no other person (besides my husband who encourages every weird thing I do except for when I say I want a dozen dogs) checks out what I do.  You do it for you.

Did you hear that?
You do it for you.  
You do it for you.
You do it for you.

(P.S.  I'm also doing it for my kid so that she doesn't live a life fearful of doing the things she wants to do because some anonymous someone somewhere might think it's weird.  Rule #1 for a happy life is not caring what anyone thinks about you.)

I want TELL YOUR STORY to become your mantra, too.  Start a blog or a YouTube/Vimeo channel or just go buy a damn notebook and some fun pens if you're not yet comfortable with going public!  Go out on picture-taking adventures and load them up to flickr with little paragraphs of where you were or why the place mattered to you.

-Sharon

JP Makes A Video!

Step Away From The News

It's been a newsworthy week and not one iota of it was remotely positive.

I used to be a news junkie and for the life of me I cannot explain why since I would wind up horrified and depressed.  And as someone with an anxiety disorder...well, I was just feeding the beast with my
news intake.  Now I steer clear of news to the best of my ability.  I unsubscribed from any site or page that was news-oriented or where news might seep in.  Of course none of those actions protect me 100% but even if I'm at 80-85% that is a healthy change.


Wise words on this from Thoreau:

Tip:  If you must have a news fix, better to read it than watch it.

Further Reading:
- Overcoming News Addiction: http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/09/overcoming-news-addiction/http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/09/overcoming-news-addiction/
- Dr. Andrew Weil on news fasting: http://www.drweil.com/drw/u/QAA401018/Need-a-News-Fast.html


 -Sharon

Insomnia & Some Other Stuff

Periodically on a regular basis I go through a insomnia-ish thing which means that I fall asleep with no problem but I don't sleep as long as I should.  My inner alarm clock thinks that 5 hours is plenty of time to sleep and so since I tend to fall asleep between 10-11pm I will wake up at 3:30am or thereabouts and there is no getting back to sleep.
As a result I frequently have reallllly long days that are basically non-productive because one cannot create when one is an exhausted zombie.


It's all very frustrating and my mood can be very cranky whilst stuck in an insomnia flare-up.  Did I mention how much lack of sleep affects my pesky chronic pain?  Yeah, I am just a big ball of delight right now.  An impatient, reclusive, frustrated, hair-in-a-ponytail-no-makeup-sweatpants-and-tshirt-carb-craving ball of delight.

And there is so much to do.  So so much to do.  There are pictures to be taken, photo art to be created, signs to be painted, website to be worked on, house to be cleaned, walks and bike rides to be taken, fun to be had, etc.

I have no energy for any of it.  Coffee doesn't help except to make me a jittery exhausted person who can't go back to sleep because I try to use caffeine to battle the crippling fatigue which never works and I should know better but I keep doing it anyhow.


via GIPHY

Yesterday on the Internet someone wrote that something was a "fig mint" of their imagination.  I'm tired and it annoyed me.  Fig mint! 

That's it for now.  I'll write more after I've had  a nap.


 -Sharon

A Simple Hello

The other day JP and I were returning home from a Craigslist excursion*.  As we approached our house we saw a woman with some kids and a dog stop in front of our house to let us pass by. She had no way of knowing that we were not going to pass her but instead were going to back into our driveway which was maybe 20 feet from where she had stopped to wait.
As we were backing in I waved to her.  We're new here in this close-knit neighborhood that we've only lived in for 3 months and of course we're wanting to be nice and know our neighbors.  We wave and say hello to everyone, we are neighborly like that.  "Hi neighbor, nice to meet you, come by for a glass of wine or a swim in our pool when the weather gets nice!"  That's us.


So she is kind of fussing with the dog or the kids but is looking up toward us.  I wave, she sees me waves and she clearly ignores me.  No smile, no nod, no mouthing a hello.  Nada.
What the hell, right?
I don't do well with being ignored particularly when I am being friendly and/or it is blatant so of course I wait until I catch her eye again and wave one more time.  Because I'm bitchy friendly like that.
Now she's caught and she knows it so does this really curt wave while doing that thing people do when someone keeps doing something and you're like "yes, okay, I see you, okay?".  You know, that sort of annoyed thing complete with the roll of the eyes.


via GIPHY

I have annoyed her with my insistence on being friendly.

I'll just let that sink in for a minute.

Afterward I am annoyed by her unwillingness to be friendly to us and I express this to JP, eventually telling him that what I should have done is to have said to her "sorry, just trying to be friendly."
This frightens him as I am wont to call people out for their bad behavior and he doesn't want us to be thought of as the cranky new neighbors.  He was concerned that if I had said that to her that she might have mentioned it to other neighbors in a "do you know what the new people said to me" way.
I, on the other hand, could not care less what she said to who...especially since she would have to out herself as someone who couldn't bother to say a simple hello to her own neighbors.  "Do you know what the new people said to me...when they smiled at me and my kids and waved hello and I completely ignored them?"  She couldn't tell the story and leave that part out.

What has happened to people that it has become too hard for them to say or indicate by way of a gesture (nod, smile) a friendly greeting to a neighbor?

Coincidentally, I read this article in the Wall Street Journal just this morning.  In it, the author talks about the French expression simple comme bonjour: simple as hello.

"...bonjour is an acknowledgement of your interlocutor, a nod to your coexistence. Omitting it isn’t just rude, it’s a refusal to see the other as an equal."

Saying hello to people you encounter isn't just good manners, it's almost your duty as a human being to acknowledge other human beings.  Not doing so only acknowledges that you somehow think you are superior to those you encounter...and ignore.  Obviously I am not suggesting that you run around tapping people on the shoulder to get their attention the next time you are at the grocery store just to say hello to them, but if you are anywhere and eye contact is made...than, yes, you greet that person with a hello, a smile, a nod.

It's the human - and neighborly - thing to do.

Do you know that something that simple can make a real difference to someone?

A hello is probably the easiest small kindness you can offer.
And kindness always (always always!) matters.

So, hello, I'm Sharon.  Nice to meet you.


Further reading:
The Power Of Hello
Beyond The Classroom: The Power Of Saying Hello





*Craigslist excursion: journey of varying length in which we endeavor to procure an item at a greatly reduced cost that someone else no longer wants in order to fill our home with items that we in turn will some day sell on Craigslist.

Home Ownership, Or How To Sound Ungrateful

Since I can remember, people have told me that owning a home should be something I should achieve.
It was just one of many things that  I didn't see the point of but would feel bad about not caring about nonetheless.

I grew up, got married WAY too young (partly because I was told it was something I should achieve), and at the age of 22 moved into the house my builder father built for me.

It was a fine house but it didn't take long until my misery kicked in.  My then husband acted as if his life was complete because WE OWNED A HOME...and there was me spending way too much time staring out the window, dreaming about what was out there that was out of my reach because we were now tethered to the HOUSE WE OWNED.

It should come as no surprise that we were divorced after a few years and he bought me out of my share of the house.  Au revoir, boring suffocating life.


I lived in many places after that and rented every single one of them.  Houses, not apartments, that I treated as if they were my own in that I planted flowers and mowed lawns and made other various improvements.  My rented homes did not look any different than the owned homes around me.  But I had something they didn't have and that was the ability to leave each year when lease renewal time rolled around which is (mostly) why I rented instead of owned.  For someone with a massive case of wanderlust (and claustrophobia), that freedom was worth every month of rent I paid.  For the record, I stayed in one rented place for eight years, giving my daughter the stability she deserved during her school years.  I didn't leave for all those years, but I could have. That made the difference.

But wait, people always say, you are throwing your money away on rent.  It's such a waste, they would say.  Nope, I countered.  A waste is a life being owned by what you own.  Some people want that; some see it as a measure of success.  I am not part of that tribe.  My husband, though, is.  And I like a happy husband so when he pushed to buy a house a year and a half ago, I caved.  "As long as it doesn't alter our lifestyle," I said, which meant that we would still hit the road on a whim, off to whatever adventure was the mood du jour.  For the record, too, I told him this when we first met.

"Of course it won't," he assured me sincerely.  He knows how I am. He also always want me happy. His intentions - and heart - are consistently in the right place when it comes to me. Sometimes, though, even when we think we've looked at the thing over under sideways down, it still doesn't work out the way we were sure it would.

We've been together since 2005 and we've moved a lot thanks to job changes and bad economies. The proverbial dust has been settled for awhile now but still we were renting because we weren't sure where we wanted to...settle.  Ugh, I even struggle with typing that word.  He wanted his own house badly, I could tell, and like I said I always want him happy.

So we searched and searched and finally found an amazing house...

 ...and it probably took about six months before I started feeling the old familiar stirrings of panic.

We spent our first summer last year restoring the in-ground pool that came with the house.  I don't really feel like talking about how much money that cost but, okay, it was a one-time expense so not a huge deal.  The bonus is the gorgeous pool that is steps out of our back door.

You can see that the pool is surrounded by trees.  In fact, our entire property is heavily treed.  We have so many trees that there's only a few hours each afternoon when the sun is directly overhead that the sun shines on the pool.

Here are some more pictures of our treed property:

That's D-Shark floating in the pool.  We named it after someone who once asked me
"you've caught the shark, now what are you going to do with it?"  Snort.

Trees, lots and lots of trees.  You know what that means, right?  It means that the pool has to be vacuumed every single day and since we have a very complicated filter I can't do it which means that my husband has to.  So every single evening instead of going out and doing fun things, I sit there drinking wine while I watch him clean the pool.

Not what I had planned for summertime.
Not what I had planned at this stage of my life.

But wait, there's more!

From these pictures you have a good idea of just how many trees are on our property.  Do you know what that means when summer is over and we can finally stop spending every day cleaning the pool?



It means all the leaves on all the trees fall down and they have to be gathered up so that the township can come by and vacuum them all away.

Last fall we spent TWO SOLID MONTHS blowing leaves every day for hours.  We had 6' tall leaf mountains all along our curb waiting to be vacuumed up. We have so many leaves to clear off our property that I had to go out and get my own leaf blower (you're jealous, aren't you?) so we could simultaneously blow leaves.  Our electric bill literally tripled in November and December just from hours and hours of running two leaf blowers.  You can't make this up.  I wish I were kidding.  I wish I were exaggerating.

To somewhat of a lesser degree, we continue with the leaf blowing in springtime to get the millions of stubborn leaves that decided not to fall until March.

Listen, we are not young people.  I have no intention of breaking my back doing YARD WORK as I get older and older.  This does not in any way, shape or form resemble the life I had in mind.

Last week my husband was going to spend $300 on rocks.
This week we have had two tree companies come out for estimates to cut the trees back some.  One estimate was for $1200 and the other was for $1800.
The previous owners installed amazingly expensive kitchen floor tile...that looks like utter crap.  It can't be cleaned properly and it turns out that's because they installed it wrong.  It will cost a few grand to demolish it and put in something normal and cleanable...or I can shell out $400 for the tile guy to clean it and seal it like it should have been sealed in the first place.
The kitchen sink was installed wrong, too.  The sprayer only sprays cold water and doesn't cut off the faucet flow when engaged.
The white rugs (what the hell were they thinking?!) in the living room and master bedroom have to be replaced sometime very soon.
Did I mention that we had a new furnace/central AC unit/water heater installed for 10 grand a couple of months ago?

If we rented, not one of these expensive problems would be our problem.

Meanwhile, we go nowhere.  We sit home now.  Well, except for our weekend trips to Home Depot and Lowes.  Aside from going to the home improvement stores, wine has replaced adventure, fun, experiences.
But, hey, at least we can tell people that we're homeowners now and they can in turn tell us how lucky we are.  Woo hoo!
And did I mention that no one comes to visit us because we live a whole two hours away (or 80 miles) and, by God, that is just too too far for friends and family to travel.  That's nothing really new, though...move ten miles away and people forget about you then, too.  Our new neighborhood seemed like the perfect place to meet new friends...maybe have some dinner parties, barbeques...that sort of thing.  But no, turns out this is a keep-to-yourself kinda neighborhood.  After 18 months I have no idea who the people are whose house abuts my own backyard as they never seem to actually come outside.  Sigh.

If you compared pictures of the adventure-having, wanderlust-fulfilling, renter me...

with the go-nowhere, couch potato, homeowner me,

 

Okay, I wouldn't spill wine on my furniture so this one is more accurate:





you would be shocked at the difference.  It is significant. Significantly bad.

Wait, I'm a bit remiss here.  We sit home only in the prime months and seasons.  In winter, we're free as carefree little birds to flitter about.  Oh, except for that who the hell wants to go anywhere in winter thing.

Yet there are still people who will say that this is better than renting.
I won't tell you what I want to say to them.

They make medication for this kind of thing, don't they?  Like a calm-down-so-you-can-like-what-everyone-else-likes pill?  An cream or salve to rub vigorously into every square inch of you to remove all traces of wanderlust and the hunger for adventure and experiences?

No?

Fill up the wineglass, please...

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UPDATE

I have had time to digest and re-read this a dozen times since I wrote it.  I probably should have expounded on the benefits of owning a home such as it's yours and you can do to it what you want which is obviously a very real benefit.  I am not convinced, though, that it outweighs the freedom of not owning.  I shall explore this further in due time.
Also, my husband has read it, too, and he reminds me that there are significant tax benefits to owning vs. renting.  He is, of course, right but no one should be surprised by that because he is the stable one in the relationship.  ;-)


 -Sharon